Scammed in Barcelona.

If you knew there was a chance of getting scammed, how much money would you be willing to lose to give it a try and not be upset?  This was the topic of a discussion we had while traveling with another couple in Barcelona.  Well, I guess it depends on what it is, right?  Here is a video of what we saw and thought "How much would you pay for this and if it didn't work, you wouldn't be upset?"

So we watched these things in real life and couldn't figure out how they worked.  After watching them for a few minutes, we wanted to buy one just to see if we could figure out how it works.  So that is where the "How much...." question came into play.  After seeing this, how much would you pay for one of these knowing that it might not work?  For us, it was five euros.We decided that since there was a good chance these things wouldn't work, we could pay with five euros and not be upset.  However, we really didn't want to spend five euros.

If you know my wife, you know that she loves to "get a deal".  She will haggle with anyone if she can.  This gadget was five euros for (2) of them.  To me, that was a deal, as I was willing to pay five euros for one.  My wife didn't want to pay that.  She haggled with the guy and ended up getting (2) for €3,50.  We then asked the guy how it worked.  The guy said, "There is a tab on the back, pull it up, place it near the wall and the sound waves will make it dance." This really didn't sound right to us, but he picked it up and showed us and then put it back down and it started to dance again.  Then he stopped the music and it just stood there.

Not fully understanding how it worked and not really believing him, we took these paper dolls back to the hotel to try to figure out how they actually worked. I Googled "dancing Bart Simpson paper doll" to see if anything came up.  That is when I found the above video, but they all said it was a scam.  Then I Googled "dancing paper doll scam" and I found this video:

After watching this, I felt bummed because I got scammed.  However, I had to remember that I'm not allowed to be upset because my price was €5,00.  So this is what €5,00 will get you. Absolutely nothing.

Do you like the way they dance?

Locked Up Abroad

Note: This is not a paid advertisement.

I recently participated in a game where I was “incarcerated” in a 19^th century prison with the goal of escaping within (3) hours.  The prison, Noordsingle, is one of the oldest prisons in the Netherlands.  It is also the largest prison and one of two prisons in the “American Style” with a cellular device.  Upon arrival, you’re automatically split up from anyone you know.  This really messed up my game plan, as I don’t speak or read Dutch.  My friend was the first to go in the prison.  As he left, he wished me luck not knowing if we would see each other on the inside or not. 

I then patiently waited for my inmate number and name to be called out in Dutch.  After what seemed like forever, I hear my name and inmate number.  I checked in, entered the prison and that is when things “got real” real fast.  As I entered the gates, there was a guard who yelled out commands to me in Dutch.  Noticing the person in front of me was stopped and at attention, I followed suit.  Then that person moved on and I moved up.  After I moved up the guard barked out an order.  I walked forward and then stopped.  Then the next command came, which I assumed meant go but I was wrong.  I went and then he yelled at me so I stopped.  Then he repeated the command and I just stood there.  Again he yelled at me and then I moved on (assuming that is what I was supposed to do). 

I then found myself in the “yard”.  Everyone was lined up in a single file line.  There was an inmate named “Saurus” doing push-ups while a guard put their foot in his back.  I lined up like everyone else and then the Warden came around.  He walked up and down every aisle and eyed everyone up and down.  Not wanting to draw attention to myself, I just looked straight ahead and didn’t blink.  Then the Warden gave a long speech.  The only words I understood were “Shawshank Redemption”, “Escape from Alcatraz” and “Prison Break”.  Then I heard something about push-ups and everyone dropped to the ground and started to do 10 push-ups (including myself).  After that we went inside and had our pictures taken and we were assigned to our cells. 

L: My intake photo. Top: to Bottom: The exterior wall, the main gate, they second prison yard.

That is where I made mistake number two.  As I walked in, the guard read off my inmate number A0002 and told me in Dutch “Twee”.  I then marched to cell #3 and joined my cell mates.  It was (2) girls and they started to speak Dutch to me right away.   I explained that I only spoke English and then we started to make a plan.  However; the guard came by and stared to yell at me.  She was pointing at me, so I was sure it me.  Then she yelled out my inmate number again and said in Dutch cell “Twee”.  I realized my mistake; I went to cell drie (three) because I heard twee and thought three.  Twee means two, so I had to make my way into cell #2. 

While in cell #2, I met my new cell mate and explained I only speak English.  The doors closed and it sounded like it does in the movies.  We started to look for clues and tried to figure out what we needed to do.  After a little while the doors opened and we could walk around.  I was able to locate my friend and we were able to make a plan.  We quickly made our way to the “yard” and started to find drugs hidden everywhere.  We knew we could use these later to get information or bribe people.  After circling the yard looking for ways to escape (while other inmates smoked, played football and fossball) we realized this is not the way to get out.  Without giving away the game, (3) hours came and went fast.

In the end, we were able to use the drugs to escape the prison while some people got involved in a riot and escaped that way.  Not everyone escaped.  I was later able to find my cell mate once I was on the outside and she did not escape.  This was an Escape Room x 1,000 with a Shawshank theme.  I would recommend this to anyone who likes interactive, realistic games.  Check out their website Prison Escape.

Super Dutch: Cycling

So it's been a while since I have written a blog.  That's because everything here is almost normal to me and not much phases me.  However; a few months ago I made a comment (I can't remember what it was) and my colleague said "That is a Super American thing to say."  I then ask her, what is "Super American"?  After some thinking, these are some of the things she came up with:

• My love/obsession for enormously large (or what I would consider "regular") size drinks.
• My obsession with ice in my drinks (you basically don't get ice in your drinks here).
• The fact that I don't ride my bike in the: rain, cold, strong wind or any other excuse I have.
• And my thought of any country outside of the US is dangerous.
• The fact that "sweet" things are not sweet enough (like peanut butter).

That lead  me to think, what do I think is "Super Dutch"?  I have a mental list, but I thought I would slowly share them blog by blog.  However; today's "Super Dutch" thing is cycling or as we would call it riding a bike. Cycling is a way of life here in the Netherlands.  Everyone from children to elderly people do it.  Since moving here, I have seen lots of odd things done on a bicycle.  Here are some of things I have seen:

1) The "bike in tow"

How this guy steers his bike and this bike is beyond me.

2) "Carpooling"

This takes extreme skill.

3) Holding hands

This one doesn't make any sense to me at all.  I think it is ridiculous.

4) Hitching a ride

The Dutch have very strong leg muscles.

4) Moving day

Not even an option for me.

5) Chit Chatters

I have been guilty of this from time to time.  Being behind these can be annoying.

The Greatest Generation.

This past weekend I traveled to northern France to visit Normandy.  For most people, this is just a place where an invasion called D-Day took place.  To me it's something a little special.  Seventy years ago, this is the place where my grandfather (Lt. Julian R. Sheehy) landed along with thousands of other young soldiers to complete a job that their country asked them to do.  As they landed, the Nazis sat waiting for them.  As the boats landed, thousand of young soldiers were mowed down by heavy machine gun fire.  Some didn't even make it out of the boats.  After the landing was complete, thousands of young soldiers lost their lives while trying to preserve freedom for Europe and the rest of the world.

My grandfather was an exception.  By some miracle, he was able to make it out of the boat, cross the beach and survived the landing.  Was it courage, was it instincts or was it a job he was asked to do and he did it without any questions?  I don't know.  What I do know is that he was a million times braver that I could ever be.  He left his family and traveled over 3,000 miles to do something amazing.  I can honestly say that I don't think I could do it.

Growing up, I used to hate going to visit my grandparents in Florida.  It was far, their house was always 80 F/ 26 C and my grandfather always seemed mean. Have you seen the Clint Eastwood movie Grand Torino?  That character was exactly like my grandfather. But as I got older, I realize how much of an amazing person he was.  In the end, he received a few Purple Hearts and survived one of the bloodiest wars ever.  I never go to ask him about it, but I would have loved to heard his amazing story of survival.

Shall we never forget what happened and never forget the men and women who sacrificed their lives so others could live in a free world.  As I travel around Europe, it's absolutely crazy what went on here and ever more crazy that so many innocent people lost their lives.

King + Orange = A Fun Day

Yesterday in the Netherlands was Koningsdag (King's Day).  What is Koningsdag? Koningsdag is the celebration of King Willem-Alexander's birthday.  It's a national holiday and is an excuse to go out, enjoy the weather on the canals and "party".  This was a special day because it was the first King's Day since the tradition started back in 1890, all other days were Koninginnedag (Queen's Day).  How would I describe it?  I would describe it as Mardi Gras meets canals meets boats meets a great time. Everyone is happy, drinking and wearing orange.

Orange is our new favorite color.

So why do they wear orange?  Well orange is the color of the Dutch Royal Family, The House of Orange-Nassau, which is a branch of the European House of Nassau.  The name Orange takes its roots from the French Princedom of Orange, named after the town Orange in the South of France.  The Queen's title is a result of marriage in 1515 between Hendrik III of Nassau-Breda and Claudia of Chalon-Orange from French Burgundy.  The dynasty had been established, when their son adopted the title of Orange-Nassau.

The morning after looks like Walking Dead meets Mardi Gras.

So the events started on Friday, Koningsnacht (King's Night).  All over the city there were stages built with bands preforming at all hours of the night and when I say all hours of the night, I mean all hours of the night.  There was a stage about 200' from our house and the bands played until about 2:00 am!  The next morning is filled with "garage" sales which is then followed by packed canals and lots of parting.  It is a lot of fun and if you come to Amsterdam for Koningsdag, a boat is the way to do it.  In the words of the Dutch "Het was Gezellig."

Where Am I?

Recently I went Geocaching with a friend of mine.  What is Geocaching?  Geocaching is a form of treasure hunt using GPS, in which an item is hidden somewhere in the world and its coordinates posted on the Internet, so that GPS users can locate it.  The reason I like to Geocache, is because it takes me to some very interesting locations.  This past weekend was no different when I ventured to a city that either has an identity crisis or has a split personality.  A confused city?  Well you tell me.

This weekend I ended up in the town of Baarle-Nassau, Netherlands or Baarle-Hertog, Belgium (depending on where I stood).  How could I be confused as to where I was?  Well, let me share a map of the area.

What is this city about and why are there lines all around it?

This town is located directly south of Amsterdam near the Belgium border, no it's in Belgium, no the map says it's in the Netherlands, but it is in Belgium, no it's in both.  It's in both, but the map clearly shows the city in the Netherlands.  Well, now you might really be confused.  In order to understand this oddity, you have to become familiar with some terms.  The first term you must know is "Enclave".  An enclave is a country, or especially, an outlying portion of a country, entirely surrounded by the territory of another country. The best example of this is Vatican City.  This is a country that is surrounded by another country, Italy.  Ok, so far so good.  The next term you must know is "Exclave".  An exclave is a portion of a country geographically separated from the main part by surrounding alien territory.  An example of this is Llivia, Spain.  This is a part of Spain that is separated from the main part of Spain by France.  Are you with me so far?  Now lets really confuse you.

How can Belgium be in the Netherlands when they are both different countries?

The town of Baarle-Nassau, Netherlands/Baarle-Hertog, Belgium is a complex example of enclaves within enclaves (also known as counter-enclaves or 2nd order enclaves).  This town consists of 22 Belgium enclaves and 8 Dutch enclaves (7 of which are counter enclaves).  This town has several markers marking the borders of each country.  One second you are in the Netherlands, then you are in Belgium and then you are back in the Netherlands.  How can you tell where you are?  Well the ground is marked letting you know where you are.

As you can see, the left side is Belgium and the right side is Netherlands and the line goes right through the front door.

Some houses that have the border going through them have a front door in one country and the other part of the house is in another country.  So the owner could sleep and wake up in the Netherlands, but then eat dinner and watch TV in Belgium.    So which country is this house in?  This house is located in both countries.  This house is the only house here where the border goes right through the front door.

Belgium on the left and the Netherlands on the right, huh?

Since the border runs right through the front door, making this house in both countries, it has 2 door bells (one for each country) and 2 house numbers (one for each country). Very odd, but yet very interesting.  So if you are ever in this area, be sure to check out GC4R5PF: Pungelpad 7 to see this odd house and area.  And this is why I love to Geocache.  Without a Geocache being placed in this area, my friend and I would have never seen this unique area, nor learned as to what this occurrence was called.  I love where my GPS takes me.  And to think, my friend has lived in this country all his life and he had never been here before.  It took an American and a Geocache to show him a unique part of his country.

Ohh that Smell...

I thought the 1977 song from Lynyrd Skynyrd would be the best title for this blog. Recently I went on a ski trip to Les Houches, France with my wife and some friends from the states. While I was there I tried to experience some French cuisine, but it mostly consisted of pizza, French fries (or fries as they are called there) and hamburgers.  On our last night, I decided to try some real French food.  The restaurant we went to didn't have a menu in English nor did the staff speak English (well, they spoke little English), but I thought we could manage.  In most cases, some of the things on the menu look very similar to English words.  Looking at the menu I decided to try "Andouillette a la moutarde". Not knowing what it was, I thought it was going to be some type of andouille sausage with mustard sauce.

It's amazing what a few extra letters can do to food.

Having lived in Louisiana, I knew exactly what andouille was.  I had it in gumbo, dirty rice and at some crawfish boils.  Louisiana is a state with French heritage, so I assumed that andouillette and andouille was the same.  I mean, it had a few extra letters on it but so did moutarde.  My first clue that this was a mistake was when the waitress came over to take our order.  I placed my order and she asked me "Do you know what that is?"  I said "Yes, its like a sausage with some mustard sauce on it, right?"  She smiled and said yes and left with our order.

This isn't the actual dish, but it looked very similar to this.

 When the food came out, everything looked good.  I cut into my meal and instantly realized I made a mistake.  Without taking a bite, I knew I was not going to be able to eat my meal.  To describe the smell, I'm going to use a phrase once used by my wife's cousin to describe the way Florida State was playing in a game they were loosing.  This thing smelt like "a bag of mashed up assholes".  I know that description is a bit graphic, but that is really the only way to describe the smell.  I turned my plate in an attempt to escape the smell and eat something else, when one of our dinner mates said "Can you turn that around?  That stuff stinks!"  I text one of my colleagues from work who is from France and she said "That stuff is made of death and intestines".

So what is this dish I ordered?

"Andouillette (French pronunciation: ​[ɑ̃dujɛt]) is a coarse-grained sausage made with pork (or occasionally veal), intestines or chitterlings, pepper, wine,onions, and seasonings. Tripe, which is the stomach lining of a cow, is sometimes an ingredient in the filler of an andouillette, but it is not the casing or the key to its manufacture. True andouillette will be an oblong tube. If made with the small intestine, it is a plump sausage generally about 25 mm in diameter but often it is much larger, possibly 7–10 cm in diameter, and stronger in scent when the colon is used. True andouillette is rarely seen outside France and has a strong, distinctive odor related to its intestinal origins and components. Although sometimes repellant to the uninitiated, this aspect of andouillette is prized by its devotees." - Wikipedia

To say it has a strong, distinctive odor is an understatement.  If you think I am exaggerating about this, I have found other blogs (The Grubworm and Things That Stink) that will back my description of  this item. One of the blogs was called "Andouillette or... The Dish of Death".  So when ordering food in another country, know that a few extra letters can change an entire meal.

That's the Sound of the Police

Since moving to Amsterdam, bicycles have been our primary form of transportation.  We ride them to work, to run errands and occasionally for fun.  The best part about riding bikes in the Netherlands is the fact that there are separate paved bike lanes to ride in. The bike lanes even have their own traffic lights to help with the flow of traffic.  While we don't "officially" know the rules of the road, I assume they are the same as driving a car in most places in the U.S.  Here are some basic cycling rules:

1. Pedestrians have the right of way (except when they walk into the bike path, then it is a game of chicken in which bikes always win).
2. While approaching an uncontrolled intersection, yield to person on the right (unless you can peddle faster than the person to your right).
3. Using a mobile telephone when cycling is authorized (it is not uncommon to see people texting with both hands while riding their bikes).
4. The maximum blood alcohol level permitted when cycling is 0.5mg, however being stopped for cycling under the influence of alcohol does not lead to the suspension of driving license (I'm not sure if the same thing applies to pot or not).
5. Approved lights at the front and back are compulsory at night and when visibility is reduced (I'm willing to bet that 97% of the people violate this rule as almost everyone is missing or has damaged lights on their bikes).
6. Red lights in the bike lanes means stop (another rule broken by a majority of the people here). 

 

"Pull the bike over ma'am"........"Headquarters, she's fleeing.  Send backup."

The last rule seems to be the easiest rule to remember, right?  Well the following may or may not have been a text I received today:

       "In my tired state, I just want to get here (home), right?  So I decided to cross the 

       street on a red light bc no card (cars) were coming.  I did this in front of a cop on 

       a motorcycle.  I drove past him, he apparently was saying hello to me but I didn't 

       hear him.  I hear a beep, see he's coming for me and pull over"

This has me a little concerned.

      "He proceeds to say that the rules here are the same in the US and he is giving me a 

       ticket for running a red light!"

At this point I'm thinking, "I'm glad this wasn't me cause I would never hear the end of it."

       "He asks for passport-don't have it"

       "He asks for my ID-don't have that either bc it's on (in) my phone at home"

This doesn't sound like it is going to end well does it?  In fact in the U.S., this usually means someone is going to jail.

      "He asks why I did it, I told him I was exhausted."

      "I don't think he like that answer"

      "So he starts writing in on his pad.  I see '75' written on the paper but don't know if

       that's the fee or what."

      "He gets a call on his CB and then just takes off"

      "Doesn't give me the paper, doesn't say anything to me but hands me back my 

      insurance card bc that's all I had to give him with my name on it (not exactly

      an 'offical' form of ID)"

      "So, I may or may not have received a ticket.  On a bike.  As if my day couldn't

      get any worse"

Sounds like someone may have dodged a bullet.  Now the waiting game begins.  Will we see if we receive a ticket for running a red light while on a bike or not.  

       

The 2013 U.S. Food Tour

We knew adjusting to life in Europe would be a little hard, but didn't think adjusting to the food was going to be an issue. Shortly after moving here, we missed some of our favorite places to eat.  I mean really, have you heard anyone wanting to go out for Dutch food?Where else in the world do you go to get Dutch food?  We may live in the Netherlands, but you can still get Mexican food, Italian food and Argentinian food.  Can you go to Italy or Mexico and get Dutch food?  I would venture to say you wouldn't even find Dutch food outside the Netherlands.  I was once told by a colleague that the Dutch are not known for their food.  In fact, he told me the Dutch only eat because they have to.  A typical Dutch lunch is kaasbroodje (a sandwhich made of bread and cheese, nothing else).  Sounds tasty right?  We do have some chain places here: Dominoes, McDonald's, Burger King, Starbucks and KFC (minus the biscuits and the mash potatoes).  These work when you're in a pinch, but we still miss some of our favorite places.

We can't wait to cross some of these places off our list.

With that being said, we started to make a list of places we wanted to eat at when we returned home for the holidays.  Keep in mind, we are not foodies, so our list of places is not very sophisticated.  In no particular order, here is the 2013 U.S. Food Tour list.

• Chick-fil-A: Carmen is excited about chicken minis and will most likely want to eat them everyday.
• Cracker Barrel:  I want to eat there for the breakfast.  Breakfast is not considered a meal here.  Basically a Dutch breakfast consists of bread with cheese and that is it.
• Texas Roadhouse/Outback: I am really wanting a simple steak and potatoes dinner.  You can't get that here at a reasonable price.
• Mexican food:  Notice I didn't specify a specific place.  As long as it has free chip and salsa and queso, that is all we need.  We'll be so happy with chips and salsa, we might not be able to eat our main meal.   
• McDonald's:  Yes we have McDonald's here, but they don't have breakfast.  I want a bacon egg and cheese biscuit, an egg mcmuffin/sausage mcmuffin with egg and Carmen is really wanting their oatmeal.  She swears its the best oatmeal ever.  
• Mellow Mushroom:  One of the best pizza places in Atlanta (we love the crust).
• The Vortex:  Burgers, burgers, burgers.  If you have ever eaten there, you know what I'm talking about. 
• BBQ:  Just like Mexican food, any kind will do.
• Waffle House:  I love my hash browns scattered, smothered, covered, topped and chunked.  They don't know what hash browns are here.
• Dunkin' Doughnuts/Krispy Kreme: Notice a breakfast theme here?  Really, they don't have breakfast here like you're used to (bread and cheese or a croissant).

This is just a quick list.  I'm sure there are several other places we want to hit while we are home.  It's a good thing we ride bikes.  We're going to need to do a couple of laps around Amsterdam once we get back.

Six to Eight Black Guys.

This story is not intended to be racist or offensive.  This is the story that was told to me and the pictures in this blog were pictures of actual events.  If you are offended easily, you might not want to look/read any further because the pictures could be offensive to some people.



Now that the disclaimer is done, lets get on with this blog.

So after being here for three months, a friend of mind posted something on my Facebook wall about Christmas here.  The story was so crazy, I didn't believe it.  I looked it up online and everything online supported the story I had heard.  Still in disbelief (that is how crazy this story was) I went to work the next day and asked a colleague about the story and she confirmed the story as being true.  Today I got to see first hand, the crazy celebration/story of the arrival of the Sinterklaas.

So in the Netherlands, they have two celebrations for Christmas.  December 5th is St. Nicolas' Day and December 25th is Christmas.  I think everyone knows what Christmas is, so I don't have to explain that.  They have Santa Clause; he flies in a sled with reindeer and delivers gifts to all the good boys and girls.  However; December 5th is another story. December 5th is St. Nicolas' Day.  This is how the story of St. Nicolas goes (hold on, cause this story is crazy).

Sinterklaas arriving in Amsterdam from Madrid, Spain.

St. Nicolas is a retired Bishop from the county Turkey.  He goes by the name Sinterklaas. He looks just like Santa Clause, but wears a hat that looks like a hat the Pope would wear. Sinterklaas lives in Spain and in mid-November he makes his way to the Netherlands via a boat (from Madrid Spain, a land locked city).  Sinterklaas travels with a white horse and about six to eight black guys called Zwarte Piet (translated: Black Pete).  Zwarte Piet is a "slave" that does Sinterklaas' bidding.  They are really black, like Wesley Snipes black. I'm told that the reason they are this black is because first of all, they are black to begin with and they travel down the chimneys and the soot in the chimneys makes them even blacker.

One of several boats with Zwarte Piets on them.

Sinterklaas rides from house to house on a white horse with the Zwarte Piets and gives gifts to all the good little boys and girls just like Santa Clause.  The Zwarte Piets give out a mixture of cookies and candies called "strooigode and Kruidnoten".  After that is done, Sinterklaas then asks the parents which little boys and girls have been bad.  If the parents point to the kids, the Zwarte Piets then kick the kids and whip them with switches.  After the beating is done, the Zwart Piets then put the kids in a sack and they bring the kids back to Spain where they are forced to work.

Now is that a crazy story or what?  If I heard that story as a kid, I would have never acted up.  After all of that takes place, Santa Clause comes on December 25th and delivers more presents to the good children.  So the children in the Netherlands get presents twice in December (if they are good) and if they are not good, they get beaten, kidnapped and taken to Spain (which Spain doesn't really sound like a bad place).  I told you this was a crazy story, so I hope everyone has been good this year so the Zwarte Piets don't come and beat you and take you to Spain.

Hazards of Biking.

I've been riding a bike as a main form of transportation for six months now.  Riding a bike in Amsterdam is not without its hazards.  Traditional hazards include trams, cars and mopeds.  But there are some other hazards that are not traditional.  Here are some non traditional hazards of biking:

1) Bike Tours:  These groups can be very dangerous.  Bike tours?  Yes.  The problem with bike tours are the tourists riding the bikes.  Since they don't want to get left behind, they will do whatever it takes to stay with the group.  This includes running red lights, pulling out in front of you and sometimes just stopping in the middle of the road to look at something.  And when you ring your bell at them, they panic and start to wobble left and right, thus making the possibility of them crashing increase.  For most of them, it is the first time in a 100 years they have rode a bike and the sites of the city is just too overwhelming for them.

They usually have matching bikes.  Beware of the matching bike gang.

2) Tram Tracks: The obvious reason these are dangerous are the trams.  If you don't pay attention, you could get hit by one, but these are also dangerous because they are deep. When crossing these on a bike, you need to make sure you turn your front tire at a sharp angle to cross them.  If you don't, you could end up on the ground and embarrassed.  I once saw a lady try to ease over these things. This was a bad decision.  As she merged over, the front wheel got stuck in the tracks and cause her to fall over and crash in front of everyone.  I will admit, I did laugh a little because I knew the error she made.  If that wasn't bad enough, the car she was in front of started honking and yelling at her.  Use caution when crossing these things.

Beware, these are deeper than they appear.

3) Tourists on Foot: These are the most dangerous "non traditional hazards".  This hazard has no regard for anything.  Like their biking counterparts, they do not pay attention to where they are going.  They will step right off the curb and in front of you without looking.They are constantly looking everywhere, but where they are walking.   They also think the bike lanes are really nice sidewalks and walk in them all the time.  You constantly have to ring your bell at them to get them to move and sometimes you have to buzz them so they will get the point.

Pay attention to where you're going!

4) "The Danger Lane": This is a common way around cars, but is very dangerous.  Once you commit to using this lane, you commit to dangers associated with it.  Car doors opening, cars swerving, hitting a bollard (or the penises as my wife likes to call them) or even hitting a pedestrian.  If something bad is going to happen on a bike, this is where it is most likely to happen.  I heard a story about someone going down this lane, but they went down it real slow.  The end result was falling on a car and not being able to get up.  Enter this lane with caution.  

Hold your breath, we could be in for a bumpy ride.

5) "The Chit-Chatters": My wife just cringed at this.  She hates that word, but that is the best way to describe these people.  These people are clearly not in any hurry to do or go anywhere.  They don't care that they are holding you up, they are not aware of anything but the conversation they are having. Because they are not paying attention to anything but their conversation, they are swerving all over the place making it impossible to pass them.  If you try to pass, you run the risk of hitting a parked car as they swerve into you. On this day, I finally had to ring my bell to get them to move so I could pass them. As I passed, the guy on the left gave me a "What's the rush jerk?" look.  I was tempted to kick him, thus knocking down and pushing him into the guy with a skunk for a hair do.  I would have called him a douche as I passed, but that translates into "shower" here and doesn't have the same insulting affect as it does in the States.

Blah, blah, blah.  We aren't in any rush.  We have all day.  This guy is clearly in a hurry to get home.  Blah, blah, blah.

With all these hazards you would think personal safety is a main focus.  Wearing a helmet is a must right? Wrong!  No one in Amsterdam wears a helmet, because wearing a helmet is for suckers and we aren't suckers.  Plus we don't want to look like tourist.  

Will it Ever Be Normal?

I've been here for four months now, and things are really starting to feel normal.  However, there are some things that still do not feel normal.  Here is something that doesn't feel normal yet:

Riding a bike- Now, this has come easier to some than others.  Some are still learning how to navigate around on their bike and keep it up right.  I have somewhat gotten used to riding my bike to work.  Every morning I ride to work, and I can’t believe that I’m riding my bike to work.  It is such a strange feeling and even more strange to see everyone else doing it.  It’s really weird to see a bunch of adults riding bikes from place to place.  However, riding my bike in all kinds of weather is another story.  Today I had to ride home in the rain, which is normal for Dutch people.  I am convinced that for this very reason, Dutch people are stronger people than Americans. 

"Get out the way, I gots to get to work for real."

You doubt me?  Picture your worst co-worker and imagine them riding a bike in the rain.  “No way!”  That has "call out sick" written all over it.  There is no way you will get a minimum wage employee in America to ride their bike to work in the rain (even if everything is relative in size and distance).  Some people will say “Well, they’re dumb for riding in the rain.  Isn't there public transportation?”  There is, but even with that they just suck it up and deal with it.  They are not consumed with what they look like when they get to work; they just know that they have to get to work no matter what.  I say all this after riding my bike in the rain two days in a row.  And like an American, I have decided today is the last day I will do that.  I will be taking public transportation to work when it rains from now on.  I can act Dutch on non-rainy days.  I'm not that much in a hurry to blend in.  

Because Six is Too Many

The other day I was in the store and saw something that I thought was odd.  I saw packages of beer and soda that had been opened.  I thought "What the hell?  Who is going around here stealing beer and soda?"  Only a few day later, I discovered that you can buy drinks in singles if you want.  I have never been in a store and thought, "I'm in the mood for one beer.  They don't have singles, well I guess I will bust up this six pack and buy one."

Four, yes.  But six, I'm not an alcoholic.

Then I wondered, what if this applied to other things like socks, underwear or other food items like eggs.  Can you imagine only buying two eggs?  What if you didn't want an entire two liter bottle of soda, so you opened it up and poured some into a container to buy.  I just found it odd that you could just open up packing of drinks and take what you want.  I guess this person was short €1,80.

Signs of the Times

This weekend there was a big festival in town.  During this time, someone went around and vandalized several of the "Do Not Enter" signs.  I thought I would share a few of them in my Photoblog this week.

"The Sculptor"

"Ikea Furniture Carrying Zone"

"Secrets in the Drawer"

"Craftsman"

"Packed in Like Sardines"

"Covering it Up"

"The Grip"

"Put a Bird on It"

"The Stockade"

"Love for the Law"

Reflecting on History.

Coming from the U.S. it is easy to forget about history.  Not to say America doesn't have a lot of history, it does.  America has lots of history, it is just most of our history happened along time ago and Americans tend to forget it.  If you live in the north, you are surrounded by the history of the Revolutionary War, in the south it's the Civil War or Civil Rights Movement and the west, filled with the expansion of America and the exploration for gold.  Since moving to Europe, I have discovered that I am constantly reminded by the history that took place here.  As I walk around my neighborhood, it is not uncommon for me to see a house that was built in the 1600's and still occupied by people.  Rembrandt is buried near my home, Van Gogh lived here and the Anne Frank house is just down the street from my house too.  It is the Anne Frank house that makes me think of history the most.  Everyone knows who Anne Frank is, but as a reminder, she is a Jewish girl who's family went into hiding during the Second World War to escape the Nazis.  They were able to hide for a few years before being discovered on August 4th, 1944.  It made me think, "surely Nazis have been in my house looking for Jewish people in hiding right?"

Recently I went to Cologne, Germany.  While I was there, we visited the National Socialism Document Center.  What is that?  A place that kept documents?  No, this was the headquarters of the Cologne Gestapo.  The Gestapo was the official secret police of Nazi Germany and German-occupied Europe.

Behind these doors people were tortured for information and most people didn't leave here alive.

It is in this prison where 400 people were murdered between 1943-1944.  Now unlike our history which happened along time ago, this history happened just 70 years ago.  Seventy years ago isn't that long.  Some of us have grandparents that fought in this war, my grandfather did.  It is hard to image that someone thought this type of action was acceptable.  It's amazing that all this type of stuff happened just a stones throw from where I live now.  I cannot image what it was like to live during a time of constant fear.  The point is to never forget about history no matter what kind of history it is.  The next time you pass a historic marker on the side of the road or the next time you pass a state/national historic site, take time to stop and reflect on the history that help form your country.

Who Can Afford to Drive?

One of the things I miss since I have moved here is driving.  I know that sounds crazy to most people, but for me I love to drive.  Most people find it stressful or a pain in the ass, but I see it as relaxing and a form of freedom.  Since moving here, I have only driven a hand full of times and in a city like this it can be a little stressful.  You have to watch for cars, bikes coming at you in every direction, people crossing the street at random times and you have to watch for trams that run in the middle of the street, all while driving a manual transmission.  Now luckily when I was growing up, my parents had manual transmission vehicles and I learned to drive on that.  In Tallahassee, that is no easy feat.  Tallahassee is very hilly, so having to stop on a hill and then go in a manual can be very challenging.  None the less, I learned how to drive a manual but only owned automatic cars.  Now in the Netherlands, almost every rental car is a manual transmission which is completely the opposite of that in the states.  Now why is this an issue?  It really isn't an issue for me, but I just thought it would be easier to learn how to drive on an automatic vs. a manual.  So why bother getting a drivers license since I don't own a car?  Well, my U.S. drivers license is only good for six months here.  After that I have to get a European drivers license.  If we rent a car to go somewhere, I will need to have a valid drivers license.  Plus the idea of having a foreign drivers license was really appealing to me.  I went to driving school's website to see if they teach driving classes in an automatic vehicle I found something interesting.

Like most Americans, I either have motor dysfunctions or have developed a fear of driving.

I was surprised to see how European's view driving an automatic.  I have been driving 24 years and never realized that I was either afraid of driving or had a motor dysfunction.  I called to get pricing on driving classes and was a little shocked.
     

                                                     -Driving manual:          € 99,00

                                                     -Theories class:          € 24,50

                                                     -Theories exam:          € 31,00

That isn't too bad, but that is just the start of it.  Now for the real cost.

                                                     -10 hours of  practical driving:   € 459,00

                                                     -Physical (really?):                     €   29,00 

                                                     -Driving exam:                            € 235,00

That is € 877.50 to learn how drive/take test (that is $1,124.87)  Who can afford this?  I wonder if they have a layaway program here?  We'll just have to see if it is worth it or not.  Maybe I ride dirty for a little while and if I get pulled over, play the stupid American card.  

Always Carry Change.

For those of you who know me, I mean really know me, you know that I don't carry any cash on me. In fact, 95% of the time I don't have a wallet on me.  Recently I've had to carry my wallet since I don't have a car to keep it in, but I still don't carry cash.  My advise to people traveling to Europe is to always carry some type of cash or change with you at all times?  I suggest this because when nature calls, you might not be able to find a free bathroom to use.  Access to public restrooms (or Water Closets (WC) as they call them here) are very few and far between.  You just can't walk into a McDonald's and go to the restroom.  Most of them  required an access codes so you have to make a purchase.  Some places charge you use the restroom.  You better have correct change or they will not let you in.  Last week we were in a train station when I had to find a restroom fast.  We found a restroom, but it cost € 0,50 to use them and if you don't have enough money they won't let you in.  My wife was short € 0,02 and they would not let her in.  She had to have them make change for a € 5,00 just to use the restroom.

Today I was running some errands and came across what appears to be a boutique restroom place.

My kind of store.

This place charges you € 1,00 to use the restroom, but it is really clean in there.  And if that isn't enough, it even has a gift shop in it for all your restroom needs.  They sell toilet brushes, toilet paper and books to read while you sit and think about things.  Maybe I should open up a place called "The Porcelain Palace".  It would have high end toilets in it, "spa" type music playing in each stall and urinals with flat screen TVs above them showing the news or ESPN.  We would also have someone in there dressed up like a butler to offer you with a variety of soaps, lotions and hand sanitizing gels.  We would even sell T-shirts in our gift shop.  "At the Porcelain Palace, we never treat you like #2".

Summer is Here!!!

It is officially summer here.  How do I know, cause it is 28° C here (84° F).  This normally isn't hot, but when you live in a house that doesn't have ceiling fans or air conditioning, that is hot.  It will be interesting to see how we handle this new "challenge" in our life.  Is it too late to add an air conditioning unit to the list that I posted in my prior blog?  Maybe we can start a sponsorship program.  People can donate money and "sponsor" various parts of the air conditioning unit.  When all things are said and done, this will look like a NASCAR car with various names on it.  The more you "sponsor" the larger your name or your company's name will appear on this unit.

"Your Name Here"

Just to give you an idea of how warm it is here, as I write this blog there is a guy next door working on my neighbor's roof.  It is so warm out, the worker has taken off all his cloths except his underwear.  Can you picture a guy in his underwear working on a roof?  Neither can I, so I tried to get a a picture to post so you all could see that I wasn't lying,  but I got caught taking a picture.  He probably thinks I'm some kind of pervert and will warn my neighbor about me.  I guess in the meantime, we will have to take some cool showers.  It will be interesting what the rest of the summer will bring and the winter too (at least we have heaters).

The List

Since we have moved here we have missed some of the "luxuries" of the states (I use the term "luxuries" loosely).  We have actually started an "import" list of the things we miss and want to import when we come home to the states.  We've have received some requests from people wanting to get some stuff for us, so I have decided to publish the list or a registry if you will (since Publix doesn't have one):

• Kraft Mac and Cheese (We know it's fake, but we love it).
• Irish Spring Original Soap (I have used this for years and it's only sold in the US).
• A bag of large marshmallows (Carmen is really needing some).
• Box of graham crackers (Can you guess what is next on the list)?
• Hershey bars (My wife is having serious s'mores withdraws). 
• Jiff Peanut Butter Creamy and Crunchy (The peanut butter here is a little gritty and not as sweet).
• Boxes of daytime Cold/Flu medicine (Apparently they really use pot here for medical purposes, which is the only reason I can come up with as to why they don't have cold medicine here).
• Hunt's Manwich Original Sloppy Joe Sauce (This is for me).
• Coffee-mate Hazelnut Creamers- Singles (My wife will kill for this).
• Sweetened Condensed Milk (If you don't know what snowcream is, you won't understand).
• Stevia in the Raw packets (See hazelnut creamer reason).
• Anti Bacterial Hand Gel (Apparently they are pro bacterial over here).
• Betty Crocker Cake mix Yellow and Red Velvet (If you know my wife, you know her love affair for cake and all cake products)
• Betty Crocker Cream Cheese Icing (You can't have Red Velvet cake without out that).
• Baker's Semi-Sweet Chocolate Squares (Don't ask).
• Bisquick (For pancakes and biscuits, duh).
• All the plastic bags you can send (They make good packing and they are like gold over here, although we use them for cat litter).

I know this is an odd list, but we are really craving these things.

Now for the scam, that is right a scam.  If you decide to send these things, send them via the United States Postal Service and claim a "low" value.  Do not send them via UPS or Fedex cause you will need to send a commercial invoice with them and we will have to pay a tariff (an importing tax) on them and it is not worth the hassle.  Your donations can be sent to the Sean and Carmen Withdraw Foundation, care of:

Sean and Carmen Allen

Prinsenstraat 11 II/III

1015DA, Amsterdam

Netherlands

In exchange, if you need some wooden shoes, stroopwafels or anything Dutch you would like we can send that to you.  Although I don't think the Dutch are really known for anything other than wooden shoes.

   

I Really miss Wal-Mart

Of course I miss my family, friends, my car, Mexican food and air conditioning, but the one thing I really miss the most (just because of convenience) is Wal-Mart.  In some ways, I feel like I have stepped back in time.  There is a shop for everything here and that is where you need to go to get everything.  The grocery store only sells groceries (you can get pet food there) and that is about it.  I literally go the store everyday.  I know Carmen though we went everyday back home, but I really go everyday sometimes twice a day.  For one reason, you can only carry some much with you.  For another reason, it appears that everything here is packaged small and has a short shelf life.  Where do you go for medicine?  You have to go to the drug store.  Oh, did I mention that they don't even carry cold/flu medicine?  That's right, they don't have cold/flue medicine here.  You can get pot here, but not cold/flue medicine?  We asked our local what do people here take when they have a cold and he responded with "Nadda".  I went to the drug store and they only give you stuff with aspirin and vitamin C in it.  Great, I get to add another thing to my "import" list when I come to visit.

Say what you want about Wal-Mart, how evil it is, how they exploit foreign workers, how they run mom and pop stores out of town, but the things they do offer is great.  Low prices and convenience, and as an American that is what I love.  I love being able to go to one place, at anytime of day and get everything I need under one roof.

Oh how I miss thee.

The other thing I miss is having someone bag your groceries.  They don't do that here, you have to do it.  You have to put your items on the belt, bag everything up and pay before the next person is ready.  And if your aren't fast enough, you end up getting in the way of the next person's items.  As a result of this affect combined with the fact that I can only carry so much, I make multiple trips to the store.  Add to that, not every store carries the same thing.  Earlier this week I decided to make Rice Krispy treats for my wife.  I had to go to two different stores in two different parts of town just to get supplies.  The first store didn't have anything I needed.

Because I am so used to Wal-Mart, I don't know where to go to get other things.  I don't know where to go to get Command Strips to hang pictures.  No one here knows what they are, so we have had to reach out and have them "imported" to us.  No one here knows what a door stop is.  Where do I go to get Drano?  I do know, but I know were to get beer and pot.  Oh well, I'll learn.